i think it’s a universal truth that everyone in our generation takes pluto’s losing its planetary status as a personal offense
i think it’s a universal truth that everyone in our generation takes pluto’s losing its planetary status as a personal offense
becoming an adult is weird
it’s like
wow i can drive a car and set my own schedule
wow i can go online and buy 50 dragon dildos
wait what?
did i stutter
my brother just sat my mum down in the living room and started crying and she was getting really worried and he burst out with ‘I’M PREGNANT’ completely seriously, and my mum started yelling and was like ‘OH MY GOD, what the fuck, I raised you to be responsible’ and she was literally ranting for about 10 minutes until she realised and quietly walked out of the room
i hate the phrase “life is short” because life is literally the longest thing that any of us will ever experience
unless you experience my penis
I just choked on my food.
that’s not the only thing you’ll choke on
no but women are so badass okay
because there will inevitably come a point in every woman’s life where she wakes up in a pool of her own blood and her reaction will be dammit now i have to do laundry
that is some suave superhero shit and you won’t ever be able to convince me otherwise
Adorable 2x
